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Terry S
12-15-2005, 11:41 AM
I dunno if this is a repost on here or not but...

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
_____________________________

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
_____________________________

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
_____________________________

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
understand her at all.
______________________________

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot
more willing to die.
______________________________

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
_____________________________

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

********

Terry S

silvery_eagle
12-15-2005, 01:41 PM
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.


LMAO THIS IS FUNNY!

dM
12-15-2005, 01:53 PM
HAHAHAH!

:2funny: :2funny:

digitalxdna
12-15-2005, 02:17 PM
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.


LMAO THIS IS FUNNY!

+1

HaVoK23
12-16-2005, 05:02 AM
HAHAHAHA :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:

Sooooo great!!!

Dagul
12-16-2005, 07:15 AM
I've seen that e-mail a few times :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:

bcmind
12-16-2005, 03:15 PM
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.


LMAO THIS IS FUNNY!


+2 LOL :2funny: